Old Timer sayings

[genegodawa]

Chaff,

our version goes like:

women are never happy unless they are unhappy.

For poli-haters:

What do you call 10 policitians on the bottom of the ocean?

.

.

.

A good start.

[Rogerio1]

Gramps used to talk about how men and women were different.

If two guys sat in boat for 8 hours and didn't say a word to each other it was no big deal. Women would go 20 minutes before one would say to the other, "Is something wrong"

[hoggs222]

Do as I say, not as I do.

We used to have to walk to school up hill, both ways!

[tunrevir]

Let me show you an old indian trick(when teaching any new technique).

We caught so many fish(bragging about the good old days) we stacked them up in the snow like cord wood.

When you see the bottoms of the leaves, you in for a heckuva storm.

You can't catch fish in the minnow bucket.

Slicker then snot on a doorhandle.

This old rod? She ain't pretty but she never lets me down.

Just a few from the past.

Tunrevir~

[hitthebricks]

Are going to fish or are you just going fishin, refering to the guy who always is playing with his equiptment

[The Grebe]

'The fish were bitin so fast, I was busier then a one legged man in an a$$ kicking contest!'

'Hand me one of them beers, I'm dryer then a popcorn fart!'

'Only 2 kinds of fish worth catchin, the big old good ones and the good old big ones!'

[Surreal Deal]

'I gotta pee so bad I can taste it!'

'I'm so hungry my big guts are eating my little ones up.'

[Surreal Deal]

Almost forgot:

'You bet your boots.'

And of course, 'Uff-da!'

I too heard my share of "In heaven there is no beer." Furthermore I spent more than a few rainy afternoons in a cabin on Leech Lake, subjected to the Statler Brother's greatest hits... on eight track. I know that doesn't have so much to do with old-timer sayings as it does with old-timer culture but I felt compelled to say it anyway.

By the way, I fish out of my dad's old 1972 Lund s-16 tiller, and I have most of that Statler Brothers album on MP3. So I guess that makes me a next generation old-timer.

[Willard_J]

"there's my other shoe!" grandpa would yell as he pulled the truck to the side of the road. never did understand why grandma wasn't impressed when we'd come back from town and tell her about it. grandpa would get the stinkeye pretty good when we would happen to find his shoe at the dump. grandpa sure couldn't keep his shoes together.

[toughguy]

I always liked "dangnabbit"

[B. Amish]

as my dad always said to me...

"what the **** were you thinking?"

[papabear]

when you find yourself in a hole... quit digging

after a pull from the bottle, I dont know how they make it so good and sell it so cheap.

you couldnt pour water from a boot if the instructions were written on the bottom.

Ohh that bite feels like another one your gonna clean tonite

[upnorth]

As the bug hits the windsheild...bet he doesn't have the guts to do that again!!

[heat checker]

"If ya want, go disk that field, dump that load of corn, pull them weeds ect.(endless list of wants). MEANING: get you're hiene out and get some work done. At least it SOUNDED polite! I now find it works on teenage son as well! Dad was smarter than I gave him credit for at the time. Oh ya, just about forgot "seeing a man about a horse" (visiting the outhouse), would've settled for a mule after a couple yrs of getting hopes up on that line.

[looneyducer]

Quality is like buying oats. If you want good clean oats you have to pay a fair price, but if you'll settle for oats that have already been through a horse, they come a little cheaper.

[mr_jman]

Ever since I can remember my dad calls rabbits, "Bunny-Hoppers" and he also likes to say "re-dic-u-lic-u-lous", and

"pic-ka-nic-ki-nick".

[Surreal Deal]

Another one:

'Oh dear, bread and beer, if I wasn't married I wouldn't be here.'

[SWMuskeye]

I bet no one's heard of this....

"you boys look like you got a case of the dread bohebus"

-"What's that Grandpa?"

-"That's when your pores turn into a-holes and you S%*^ yourself to death."

[The Grebe]

No, but I have heard of the dreaded mogai...thats when your bohebus falls out the leg of your pants!

[backlash 1]

You don't have an ice cubes chance in he L L.

I'm going to hit the hay.

I'm so hungry I could eat the hind end out of a menstrating skunk.

Rise and shine.

Daylight in the swamp.

Slower than molasas in january.

Sprekens Z doich?

I'm so hot i'm sweating bullets.

It's raining cats and dogs.

I have to pee so bad my eyes are floating.

[snoozebutton]

Smilin' like a jackass eatin' thistles.

[Mcfin]

The older the violin, the sweeter the music

[Neighbor_guy]

"I'd buy that for a dollar..."

"That tasted like another one"

[redhooks]

"The bigger the bait, the bigger the fish"

Gramps caught many big gators on a huge redwhite daredevil

"Hotter than a 2 dollar pistol" aka stolen

"Dancin like a cat on a hot tin roof"

"Shakin like a whore in church"

" slicker than snot on the toiletseat"

" Colder than a witches ----- drinking lemonade on the shady side of an iceberg"

[Surreal Deal]

"That tasted like another one"

Variation: 'That tastes like MORE!'