WIFE

[pipesmoker]

My wife is very understanding. My only hobby is ice fishing. I don't open water fish. I take 3-4 weeks vacation just to ice fish. Every other minute is spending time with her and the kids. The only thing she doesn't like is the money I spend on it. She doesn't understand why I NEED 15 Thorne Bros rods!!!

Good Luck,

Steve

[fishersofmen]

Like everyone says do whatever you can on your side to compromise with her and work it out. If that doesn't work its time to trade her in. Unfortunately with some women you can't work these things out, they are going to nag and whine eveytime you leave the house without them. I have been there and done that and there is no end to it. My wife of 4 years now encourages me to go fishing because she understands it is something that I need just as she has her needs as well. I wish you the best it can truely be a difficult situation.

[harvey lee]

I've been married 40 years and my bride has no problem with fishing or hunting. I started taking the kids out at about the age of three and they thought it was great being out with dad. Now, my wife sometimes tells me that I've been working too hard and that I should get out on the lake. It helps that I give her parents fresh fish once in a while. She has her interests and I have mine. We're married but we still are individuals.

I totally agree IHB.

[DRH1175]

How often is it that you go? I work 4 10's my fishing day is Friday. She is at work so it really doesn't even matter if I am gone. My wife though is very supportive as she has hobbies too aka Photography. I love my wife alot. I think it is good that we both do our own things. She loves the boat in the summer. But until I build my own wheel house I doubt she will ever go ice fishing more than once a year. We also have no kids yet so that probably helps. I do know though when I do build a wheel house so I can go for the weekend. Maybe 2 weekends a month is about all she will allow me to be gone. Since we don't see eachother too much during the week. Good luck! If you guys have a good relationship definitly don't let fishing ruin it. But with that said. If you can never go how is a guy suppose to stay sane?!

[GrizzlyAdams]

Quote:

If you can never go how is a guy suppose to stay sane?!

Couldn't agree more. I am pretty lucky my GF will let me go pretty much whenever. But she also knows that fishing is the one thing in life I truely love and it is what keeps me sane. No one and I mean no one will take fishing away from me. If I have to choose she knows she will lose. Without fishing life would be way less enjoyable. Time away does make things better. When we are together all the time we tend to drive each other crazy and end up fighting over something stupid. She loves to go fishing with me when she can and it was actually her idea to take a fishing trip uo north over Valentines. So I would say I am pretty lucky that way.

[TylerS]

My wife likes to fish during the summer, and I get her to ice fish once in awhile (this weekend the weather is going to be nice, so she really wants to fish Ottertail...can't get enough walleyes!)

And when I do get guff, I always tell her "well, would you rather I hunt and fish or be like all the other guys you hear about? I could always pick up video games or starting hitting the bars every night. Would that be better?"

But all I can say is...thank GOD my wife is working! Before that, when she was in school, I'd get the 3rd degree or a guilt trip almost every time I went out (of course, I was working 2-midnight four times a week, so I either fished or hunted at least 2 or 3 times a week). Now she's a nurse working either straight days or straight nights and sometimes weekends. When she's on nights, it's "get out of the house so I can sleep!"

No sweeter words have ever been spoken...

[bassnbucks]

My wife enjoys coming with fishing. I setup the camera so its on her jig and as long as fish come through she is happy. If it is slow she gets kind of bored but for the most part she likes to fish. And she really loves it when she out fishes me!! I think I really lucked out when with her, she is like one of the guys. She fihes both summer and winter, hunts-- rifle deer, bow deer, and pheasant hunts. She got me into golfing, and she skiis.

[pulleye16]

I broke my wife in while we were dating..fall through end of march is my busy time. We each kept things from our single lives that couldn't be change in our married life. She kept her Volleyball and i kept hunting and fishing, yeah there are some times when I have "other" things to do a can't go hunting or fishing but you can count your lucky stars that EVERY opener both hunting and fishing I'll have open for me time... Maybe you should try to get her into a hobbie...thats on the weekends...and is just for HER or HER GIRLFRIENDS.

[Lip_Ripper Guy]

Good point. A wife or girlfriend without a hobby is the kiss of death for your hobbies.

[OnAFly]

I know that pain. I keep trying to get mine into a hobby. She wanted to golf at first, but then decided she didn't want to do that.

She like to fish, but only in the hours between 11 and noon, there is partial cloud cover, it is 75 degrees, the lake is clear, nothing else is going on anywhere in the world, it takes less than 10 minutes to get everything ready and get to the lake, and so on...I need to get her a hobby other than shopping.

[Shaktom]

When I go fishing I am leaving a 6 yr old and 8 yr old in her care. I can understand her no wanting to be a single parent on a regular basis. I bring the kids if I can and as they get older I expect the opportunities to increase...I hope.

[BLACKJACK]

After we had been married for a few years my wife confided in me that when we were dating, the first fall she thought she'd have to grow antlers and tail feathers in order to get my attention!!! Luckily it made her realize how important hunting was to me. Now she knows that from duck opener thru November I will be either duck, deer, or pheasant hunting every chance I get. Shes learned thats the time for her to take her continueing ed classes, take trips to see her sisters, etc.

I also try to space out the 'gone all weekend' trips, lots of times I'll pheasant hunt in the morning and then spend time with her in the afternoon. Same with fishing, I don't go ice fishing every night, I space things out.

She does bowhunt, but its more to please me I think. She will go fishing with me but she wants me to 'go find the fish' then she'll come with me, either on open water or ice fishing. If I can get her on fish, she enjoys it.

My next big purchase is going to be a wheel house with all the bells and whistles, my idea is to take her out on a Sat afternoon, get the lines down, make supper, let her watch a movie, fall asleep when she wants, I'll fish and mind the rattle reels, get up in the morning, have coffee and rolls, then go home. If that works out, then hopefully we can stretch that into longer trips.

I do wish she had more hobbies but thats another subject!!!

I also pay for a nice weekend out sometime during the winter - watch for my next post!!

[tsande00]

My wife is pretty good about it, but I too must leave a 4 year old and a 1 year old in her care (plus she is 7 months pregnant). I try to keep my ice excursions to under 2 nights a week. I try not to make it an all day thing. Watching little kids isn't the easiest thing to do in the world...especially when you're outnumbered!

I hear about it some nights like I"m the biggest A_hole on earth, but then the next time I hint at going out she's all encouraging about it. I'll never understand.

[herefish101]

Good point. A wife or girlfriend without a hobby is the kiss of death for your hobbies.

I belive this is the problem, my wife has no hobbies at all, none, so she tries to squash mine so i have to sit in the house and do as i'm told. She could be in for a rude awakening, or i just need to out last her, my boys are 2 1/2, and 1 1/2, so i fugure next year at least one of them will come with, and once they both are hooked she's either coming with or sittin at home by herself. I just need to make it two more winters.

[zamboni]

This is easy, tell your wife you're gonna go have an affair, when she complains, just tell her you're kidding and that you're only gonna go fishing. Then she will see it could be worse

[Scott K]

Then we will have another divorce thread

[buckx37x]

I had to chime in on this one,I actually meet my wife while ice fishing 27yrs. ago shes fished and hunted with me ever since although now two boys later they get most of the hunting and fishing time in with me. But my wife jumps at ever chance she gets to go.

[chris63]

Does she have a sister?c63

[not_nuf_time]

You need to hussle up and and have some kids, that'll keep her busy. It's a short term solution though, cause down the road kids take up the majority of non work time with coaching, running to and fro. My wife is great about letting me go, usually she's bugging me and the boy to go catch some fish and once in a while bring some home to eat.

[Walterwontfalter]

If I want to go fishing on Saturday.. Wednesday after I get home from work I ask two questions....

"Honey, what is going on this weekend?" and

"I'm going fishing on Saturday, what do you need me to get done around here before I go?"

And get it done. Usually me banging around and swearing, trying to fix something with my poor handyman skills and she's more than ready to get me out of the house for some peace and quiet. And I encourage my wife to do things with her sister or friends whenever she wants to or even when she kind of doesn't want to. If she has stuff to do without me... I can do my own thing.

[zamboni]

Then we will have another divorce thread

Nah, my point was she will be happy you are fishing and not getting all "Tiger Woods" on her.

[wplatehunter]

As long as they are happy we are happy. The problem is keeping them happy.

[herefish101]

Took her fishing today, she outfished me. But i let her use the LX5 the whole time so that can only be expected(excuse). Grilled some steaks had a great lunch, she had a blast. My new goal is to try to get her out with me at least once a month so that will make 3 or 4 times a year, I think this will keep her happy.

[Surreal Deal]

I started taking my father in-law fishing, now she never complains!

[NEANGLER]

It trully time to sit down and talk to her about this before it escalates into resentment, anger, etc. Tell her she knew you liked to do these things before you got married and are going to continue to do them. Encourage her to do things that she likes to do by herself, with her friends and you sometimes. Each of you needs your alone time and if you don't you will start resenting each other. Offer to watch the kids while she goes and does something on her own or with friends.

If she doesn't see eye to eye on this it is probably a good idea to talk to a counselor. There are probably other issues besides you just going fishing that is bothering her. Yes there is compromise in a marriage but it has to be BOTH ways. If it is not, it is not worth being miserable the rest of your life, if it is like this now it is not going to get better it will get worse, Unless you have some open communication about this and other topics that upset you and her.