Anoka County Divorce/ Attorneys

[royal purple]

So it's looking like I'm headed for divorce and I could use some help. I'll spare you the details, the marriage is over. What I'm scared of is only seeing my kids every other weekend. I've heard Anoka county is terrible for dads and am afraid of getting screwed.

Does anyone have any experience with this type of situation? Any lawyer recommendations? The options seem endless and who knows who is good or not.

Thanks in advance guys.

[eyedr]

Check your pm

[6arrows]

All im going to say is She gets the goldmine you get the shaft

[leech~~]

So it's looking like I'm headed for divorce and I could use some help. I'll spare you the details, the marriage is over. What I'm scared of is only seeing my kids every other weekend. I've heard Anoka county is terrible for dads and am afraid of getting screwed.

Does anyone have any experience with this type of situation? Any lawyer recommendations? The options seem endless and who knows who is good or not.

Thanks in advance guys.

Sorry to hear and Welcome to HSO. A lot of good advise has come out of this Outdoor forum, hopefully you can get some ideas here??

[CaptainMusky]

Huson law firm is the "lawyer for dad". I've never used them but heard their advertisements on kfan. Probably worth a consult. Good luck and hope you get what you deserve.

[Tom7227]

A good lawyer doesn't have to advertise, the reputation and referrals keep them busy. Keep looking for advice from former clients. A lawyer who practices in the area and knows the judges and court personnel is the way to go. BTW I retired after 34 years of practice but not in Anoka.

[royal purple]

Tom, how important is it to have a lawyer based in the same county that the proceedings will take place? I have a strong recommendation for a lawyer, but she's based in St. Paul. I've interviewed another from Anoka and she seems good but I like the St. Paul attorney better. I'm struggling to find any recommendations on attorneys as I don't know many people that have been through this. Do you have anyone in Anoka Co you would recommend?

[leechlake]

I'd want an attorney that is familiar with the county, as Tom stated.

Also, follow your attorney's advise. Watch your communications especially when you are frustrated, angry, scared. I've luckily never been through this but it's amazing some things that people text to the ex-spouse that get them in trouble.

One of your goals and maybe your top priority is your child/children. Knowing that dad took the high road will pay dividends down the road. Your wife may take the high road too or choose a different route that is out of your hands.

Ask your attorney or a friend you trust about finding a counselor to talk to to help you through this. It ends up being cheaper to talk to a counselor than calling your attorney every time your upset. Those attorney bills can really surprise you when you don't keep tabs on the bill your racking up with every communication.

[ozzie]

Tom, how important is it to have a lawyer based in the same county that the proceedings will take place? I have a strong recommendation for a lawyer, but she's based in St. Paul. I've interviewed another from Anoka and she seems good but I like the St. Paul attorney better. I'm struggling to find any recommendations on attorneys as I don't know many people that have been through this. Do you have anyone in Anoka Co you would recommend?

Tom Said:

A good lawyer doesn't have to advertise, the reputation and referrals keep them busy. Keep looking for advice from former clients. A lawyer who practices in the area and knows the judges and court personnel is the way to go. BTW I retired after 34 years of practice but not in Anoka.

Good Luck

[Tom7227]

No recommendation from me. If you find a lawyer you like see if that person has much experience in Anoka. If so you should be OK. If that person doesn't see if they can recommend someone that does. Soft and easy is the way to go IMO when at the start. War paint can be applied later in the process if needed.

[Down Deep]

I can't recommend an attorney in your area, but I do have couple of suggestions for you to consider. First, divorce is emotional which can cloud judgement, so listen the advice you receive from the expert. Second, an attorney will argue a case as long as you want them to; so be prepared to compromise. Third, having been through a child custody case with my son I discovered that as long as I had money on the table the case went on, so don't be timid about discussing fees and negotiate payment and cost. Finally, select an attorney that specializes in divorce and family matters.

Sorry to hear about the divorce, but keep the the faith as there is a whole new life in your future.

[Tom7227]

One thing to realize is that unless there are child custody issues involved a divorce is really only about money.

It has noting to do with love, who is right and who is wrong, who did what or didn't. Nothing more than money.

Thirty years ago a friend was going through a divorce and came back from a meeting with the spouse and both lawyers. The friend was pumped because she 'won'. They met for over an hour arguing about a coffee pot. When I pointed out that it had to be an expensive coffee pot because the lawyers had cost at least $200 (again, about 1980 prices) my friend was a bit less elated about the victory.

Divorces take time, required by the court system. That is to give folks a chance to work things out and to try and wring the emotions out of the process. That is tough for most people because emotions pretty much are what cause folks to get married and also to get divorced. But in the end the divorce is about money - who gets what. If you keep that in mind at every step it will be a less costly process for both parties.

Remember that $200 coffee pot. My friend would have been ahead of the game to give it up, safe the lawyers fees, and go buy a new one.

[OnAFly]

In my experience if there are kids involved and you think you wound up with a decent deal on the assets side, that will change if she wants to negotiate CS payments vs parenting time. Get ready to pay more to be able to see your kids. It's a great system The situation I went through basically put 0 value in the father being a part of the parenting.

The system is completely rigged in favor of the mother. Unless she's lighting up the crack pipe in the courtroom, be prepared to feel screwed.

[Dave S]

The system is completely rigged in favor of the mother. Unless she's lighting up the crack pipe in the courtroom, be prepared to feel screwed.

Depending on the county where proceedings are taking place, I couldn't agree more. Not to shoot down the OPs confidence, I've heard bad things about Anoka, Scott and Dakota Counties as far as how the fathers end up in a divorce. Nevermind that as it's only hear-say and each case is different.

My own personal experience in Le Sueur County has been a nightmare. So much so that it carried over into my current marriage and their attempts to manipulate my relationship with my current wife. They tried to get her to kick me out and live off the state and force me to pay child support for our first son. In so many uncertain words, she told them to go pack sand and walked out of the office. Had it been financially possible, I would have pursued any possible legal action. Sickening that our DHS offices, or this one in particular, are willing to break up a family in order to put someone on the public's dole.

All I can say is good luck. Divorce is a bad thing but never put yourselves before your kids. They are always the ones who suffer and pay the ultimate price in a divorce.