Relationship Advice Needed for a Northwoods Girl

[SmallieSweetie]

Alright, so I know this is an outdoors forum, but I need some advice. I made a mistake a broke it off with the love of my life two months ago. A man who is also a supervisor of this site and shares all the love for the outdoors as I. We've been together for almost 5 years, facing many bumps in the road. I've told him how I feel...what else do I need to do? Thanks!

On a side note:

I'm home for spring break and it's so depressing to see the fish houses gone. Now the trouble is all the snow preventing me from getting to the ice. Not quite sure how I feel about this late semi-blizzard. *laughing*

[ReverendJohn]

Go to him in person and tell him that you made a mistake and tell him that you are willing to work things out.

Reverend John

[Powerstroke]

I agree with that. HOnesty is still the best policy. If that don't work its not meant to be. You've been through thick and thin, but if its been more thin than thick, maybe think it over. Its hard to let go, but if it was right to leave then don't fight for something thats not there.

[SmallieSweetie]

Thanks guys, for getting back to me so soon. It's always nice to have some male advice. I'll keep ya posted.

[Mike89]

I agree, go for the truth. It can also set you free, not by losing him, but by regaing him. Mike89

[fisherking01]

You need a higher authority than I to answer that, Pray about it, put yourself first, follow your heart. Good luck, Brent

[Whoaru99]

Be persistent, patient, and respectful, but don't be a pest.

If the guy was really into you as much as you were him, he should eventually come around. He might make you squirm a while (seems like forever) for that slap in the face.

Powerstroke hit the big picture pretty well in his advice.

[eyepatrol]

Communicate with each other.

[Eric Wettschreck]

Buy the dude a new auger.

[Muskycrazy]

This may sound hypocritical but don't take relationship advice off the internet from people you don't know . Talk to a friend or a relative . I know these guys are offering sound advice and do mean well but its kind of impersonal . No offense ment to anyone so please take no offense . And can somebody please tell me why a site this big has no spell check ?

[Whoaru99]

Quote:

---

This may sound hypocritical but don't take relationship advice off the internet from people you don't know . Talk to a friend or a relative . I know these guys are offering sound advice and do mean well but its kind of impersonal . No offense ment to anyone so please take no offense.

---

No offense taken, however I think that advice from the outside is better in some regards. Generally speaking, I think it's at least more impartial. Advice from personal friends and relatives, IMO, can be rather biased. Not that advice from strangers can't be biased, but probably less directly so.

[Muskycrazy]

That may be true . Point taken .

[delmuts]

"And can somebody please tell me why a site this big has no spell check ? "

we are just talking here. spelling isn't a top priority for many of us, as long as we can get the message accross. also, it mite be an added load on the sys.

[BendnSend]

I guess my advice wasnt good enuf, just tryin to help both ends of the spectrum! Oh well...

[SmallieSweetie]

A truly appreciate all of your help on here. I realize a few of you found putting this on here inappropriate, but I needed some outside male advice. I've told him how I felt and now the ball is in his court. I may have made the mistake, but it takes two to make a relationship work. If anything, we'll hopefully end up as good friends. Thank you again for all your help.

On another side note:

I'm seriously craving some fishing time, clears the head, where can I go to just catch some fish. That's all I need right now.

[McGurk]

Be honest with him second and yourself first. You obviously left him before for some reason(s), and the loneliness resulting may be construed as wanting to get back with him. It may just be adjusting to not having someone there at all times, and you want the quick patch (get back together). Or he might be the right guy, I don't know. Reread the first line.

And, if it doesn't work out, I'm sure a little more "trolling" around this site will produce a keeper to take you fishing (as you keep saying ).

[SmallieSweetie]

McGurk! I did not say that. *laughing* I think you're putting words into my mouth for me.

I've already been asking myself that very same statement/s you posed above. There were reasons for my unhappiness, but I've sorted through them and told him. Thank you for your advice!

[Random guy]

Been married a couple of times, always a communication failure that started the whole works. Be straight and say it how you think it from both sides, if you can find a common ground and work it out it will be one of many times you will need to say "we need to fix something" through the years. If the cold hard truth just angers each side maybe it is time to move on instead of digging a deeper hole.

Trouble is now he was "dumped", sadly that will create some hard feeling and make the whole deal a little unstable in his mind.

..and if it does work out tell that guy to get a haircut, heck even it doesn't still tell him to get a haircut.

I thought about getting into another relationship, I bought a boat instead.

[Eric Wettschreck]

Quote:

---

I thought about getting into another relationship, I bought a boat instead.

---

Now that was just plain flat out funny.

[SmallieSweetie]

You're totally right Jon. I hope that things will work out. He knows my heart's still in it. I just messed up. Thanks for the advice and your last statement about killed me. *laughing hard*

[Random guy]

Quote:

---

Thanks for the advice and your last statement about killed me. *laughing hard*

---

Well how I look at it is women have come and gone, I have bought and sold houses and destoyed trucks but I have always had a boat, so the boat was a safe bet. Not to mention the boat doesn't get mad if I fish in another boat, the boat doesn't get all worked up if I look at another boat, the boat is fine if I ignore it all winter and the boat always wants to go fishing and could care less about much else...just a good idea for me.

[kaz2611]

relationships can be difficult and nearly impossible to keep if the communication process breaksdown or dont exist to begin with. i was in a relationship for 11 yrs never got married basically cause there was a few times we had split up and i had some doubts if it would last. well it didnt last communication failed us both i was hunting or fishing all the time and not spending time with her plus i chose drinking with friends another important thing. well we had a daughter and in 2003 our relationship ended we still get along for our daughters sake but it really hurts to not see my daughter on a daily basis and mostly is because i was selfish. so my advice is if you truly want to make this work you both have to always have strong communication and be more willing to do things with the other half .

[Muskycrazy]

I dunno . If a relationship requires too much " work " or either person has to give up things they like in order to be with each other , the relationship is on shakey ground to begin with . Why is it that when two people met each other the things that made the attraction to begin with so quickly becomes not good enough . People meet , fall in love and then spend the rest of the relationship , for as long as it lasts , trying to mold each other into something they think they want . Generally what will happen is that when they find out what they have created isn't what they wanted at all - its over . If you have to give up something you love to do to be with somebody then its going to be a relationship thats mainly based on what one person wants .

[Random guy]

Well put Muskycrazy

[Mike89]

well put Muskycrazy, that's something all could think about.