Fishin report for Lake Iwanttobethere..

[Bobby Bass]

I think we missed it, Indian Summer that is. The past few days have been overcast and damp. A few showers here and there and just enough rain to get things wet and with no sunshine things never get dry. The leaves have taken a beating, all they needed was to get wet and heavy and the winds had easy pickings. I glanced out the window yesterday and I thought it was snowing till I looked back and saw it was just leaves falling. It took awhile but the deer have finally appeared and cleaned up all the fallen apples around the trees. To bad they do not eat leaves as the yard is covered with them. When I let the dogs out they take their time, noses down rooting around in the wet grass and leaves. Duncan especially is working his nose, head down and butt in the air, tail wagging he weaves his way around the yard sniffing something.

Supposed to dry up and warm up on Sunday, I had a thought of maybe fishing but I look at everything that needs to be done and I have second thoughts. Oil changes on the trucks and the Puddle Humper needs to be emptied. Have to winterize the outboard and put the tarp on. Rods and tackle boxes need to be brought in and life vests hung in the shop. Gardens should get tilled and there might actually have been enough rain that the ground has soften up some. If things dry out the mower will be run across the yard to mulch leaves and I will try and get everything put away so I don't get caught by the first snow storm like last year. Lake Iwanttobethere has been quiet, no one fishing that I have seen. A lot of docks are up on shore and with the leaves down you can see the blue of tarps dotting the shoreline covering pontoons and wood piles.

Out on the highway the produce stand is busy as a big tarp lays on the ground covered in assorted size pumpkins. Bales of straw are stacked at the edge and stalks of corn tied in bundles to be used for decorations lean against the hay wall. The place seems to be pretty busy just at dusk as city folk come out to get pumpkins. I expect Saturday will be a busy one as we are like ten days away from Halloween. The pumpkin patch was bigger but as the days go by the selection gets smaller and the prices a little better.

Elmer has been a little under the weather, he has the cold that had been going around. I saw him yesterday down getting his mail, good thing the school bus had already gone by. He was wearing his leather hunting boots with the laces dragging on the ground, flannel bottoms and a white sleeveless tee shirt. He had on a candy striped bathrobe that he was holding partly closed with his right hand while he was holding his cigar with the other. His fur bomber cap was firmly perched on his head and the flaps were sticking up. I gave him a wave and he returned it without a lot of enthusiasm. I mentioned that I saw Elmer to the wife and she said that she was going over later with apple pie and chicken noodle soup. I perked up a little at that, means she will be making pie.

The typed fall honey do list sits on the desk and there is not to many things with a check mark along side them. Matter of fact there are a growing number of entries written in hand at the bottom making the list even bigger. If Indian Summer would appear I could make quick work of the list but the forecast is calling for more rain then sunshine, from Lake Iwanttobethere {836,006}

[Bobby Bass]

Running errands today and even though the grass is wet it looks like it is drying finally. The drive into town on the damp dirt road didn't leave a rooster tail of dust in the rear view mirror. Took it slow around the bends and sure enough there are bird hunters out, trucks parked alongside of the road or blocking tote road entrances. The Leafers are all but gone, nothing left to see on the trees. Should be a couple good weeks of grouse hunting before deer season starts up. I have heard that the Timberdoodles are moving through and some guys have been at the Lodge in the evening reporting they have shot their limit of three everyday this past week.

Last night I spent some time at the Lodge and got some card playing in and also caught the hockey game on TV The local college team lost but it is just the beginning to a long season. No one watching baseball, as soon as the Yankees lost there is no one to root against. Hammering Hank came in shouting that he saw a deadly otter. Guys sitting at the bar waved him off and told him he has been watching to many shows on the History Channel. I would tend to agree as it seems that every time one of them shows goes to commercial break there is some deadly animal closing in. There was a two hour show last night on after the hockey game named after a big river up north. Did you know that the king salmon is an important part of life on that river? They only tell you that about every two minutes. With some proper editing they could have made the two hour show about fifteen minutes long.

Could you imagine a History Channel show about Lake Iwanttobethere? We get that Mike guy to do the narrating and maybe some pickup truck company to sponsor it. Before every commercial break they could talk about the deadly Pink Flamingoes on a stick that we have here at the lake. Actually if they did a show on Lake Iwanttobethere they could cancel a lot of their other shows. We have logging up here and watching Hammering Hank and Skinny topping pines while standing on ladders in the back of the work truck could be pretty exciting, especially when the trucks are still moving. We don't have any hog hunters but them ground hogs are just a smaller version. Could be a pretty good segment with Elmer and Pepper chasing groundhogs through Elmers garden. We could go to commercial just as they corner a deadly hog in the shed.

Instead of the King salmon they could film the wild smelt run down at Mystery Creek, but they would have to put in a disclaimer right before they show someone biting a smelt head off. Leech roundup and the deadly catch of the rusty crayfish. Attacks of otters on swimmers and winter snowstorms. The more I think of it I think every show on the History Channel could be shot right here at the Lodge. We could also have a beer brewery show and what could be more dangerous then the ice house fling or harvesting ice from the lake. Tractor races and making bio-disel fuel with Reed in his garage. We have not even gotten to what a spin off show featuring the Fellows would be like. I'm just saying that it could be interesting, If I was in charge I would make sure we would never go to commercial talking about deadly moles, and return about how close a call we just survived, from Lake Iwanttobethere {836,864}

[leechlake]

great report. The difference between many of our lives and tv shows is the editing. We don't get the edit the slower times in our lives and showcase the comedic or interesting parts.

I think if you took a three day deer hunt with 8 guys and edited it into a 22 minute tv show it would be priceless and probably more interesting than 95% of things you see on tv.

[Bobby Bass]

Kind of a lazy weekend but that is good. Went to a football game on Saturday and it is hard to beat watching football outdoors on a Saturday afternoon. A little sunshine lots of blowing leaves and some hot cocoa not to mention the scenery was pretty good. Guess I should mention I went to the big city and saw a college game. Sunday was more football at the Lodge and it was a little busy. It helps business when the local pro team wins a few games. The Fellows are getting pretty excited about going on a road trip down to the big twin cities to watch a game and maybe even stay over night. The staying over night is always factored in on any road trip that they have to use Reed's Bio-disel RV.

Today finds me back at the cabin with a sharpen pencil ready to check off things from the Honey Do List. Have already been down to the General Store where I bought some lower unit oil for the Puddle Humper. I have the screws out and it is draining as you read this. The forecast has changed once again and what was to be a sunny week is now going to be a wet one. I have to finish picking up the yard and then I am going to get the lawn tractor out and mow. Still some leaves blowing into the yard from Elmer's but with him fighting his cold I am just going to go ahead and mulch them instead of blowing them back into his. I have to put a new sign up that I bought from Big Earl today sometime to. He had a few extras left over so I bought one for two dollars. The signs are white with red lettering that state the premises are under radio surveillance. Ya I know makes no sense to me either but it sure does make you stop and scratch your head trying to figure it out.

Big Earl has a couple of the signs on the wall near the loading dock and also out by his parking lot. He says he watches people all the time read the "You are under video surveillance " signs and then they look for the cameras. Now with the radio surveillance sign's people are stopping and cocking their heads listening. Big Earl watches them on his cameras and chuckles. Little more than a week out from Halloween also Town Hall meeting and Lodge meeting, going to be a lot of meetings going on. County trucks were here today with the first load of orange barrels, looks like construction is coming to an end for this season. Hammering Hank and Skinny were busy rolling the barrels to the back of the parking lot and sorting through them.

Back at the cabin when I came in Smokie the big black tomcat was looking to get outside. Duncan was with him so I let them both out. Smokie made a beeline to the shop and went inside, Duncan was right behind. I stood on the deck and watched, I don't trust the two of them together. I gave them a few minutes then I heard the metal coffee can of screws hit the shop floor. I yelled for Duncan but Smokie was the first out the door and he was not alone. In his mouth it looked like he had a field mouse which he carried a few steps away from the shop door. Duncan charging out the door hit the brakes when he saw Smokie. Smokie dropped the mouse which headed for a pile of leaves with Duncan now in pursuit. Smokie walked to the deck climbed the steps and went to the back door of the cabin. He then sat and stated cleaning his paws like bored cats tend to do. Duncan head deep in the leaves was making a mess of the pile, the mouse no doubt was long gone. I felt a rain drop and I came in to kill some time and see what happens, from Lake Iwanttobethere {838,363}

[Bobby Bass]

Plans change things happen and the Honey Do List remains the same. Yesterday I had good intentions of beating the rain and mulching the leaves in the yard with the garden tractor. After posting a story I put on a hat, grabbed some gloves and headed out to start the job. I got about ten feet onto the grass when the tractor shuddered and the mower blades came to an abrupt stop. I'm thinking I flung a drive belt so back to the shop I went and up on the ramps. I was not so lucky, I had laid waste to a spindle on one of the blades. So much for mulching the yard. Tractor off the ramps and I drove it into the shop and I started a little fire in the pot belly stove, first fall fire in there. With Duncan on the floor along side of me watching intently I pulled the mower deck off. A few ball bearings rolled around me and the blade spindle was shot so I took it off the deck and sat it on the work counter, will have to get a replacement.

As long as I had the deck off I fired up the compressor and started chipping away at the deck cleaning it of packed old grass and flakes of paint. The other blades were taken off and set by the grinder to be sharpen when I put the mower back together. After an hour of cleaning I was debating if I should just go ahead and paint the deck as long as I had it off but I thought getting a new spindle should come first. I went back to the cabin and told the wife I was headed into town, do we need anything? "No" was her reply and I was out the door before she could come up with something.

No dogs came with me, as a matter of fact I didn't even see any. I think the wife was baking cookies and they were all in the kitchen, the dogs no doubt looking for hand outs. I arrived a while later at Big Earls General Store, a big yellow Grand Opening Banner was flapping from the flag pole. Every time Earl has a new display in the store he announced it as a Grand Opening so I was wondering what he had going on today. I walked past Barb at the check out and continued my way down to the garden section which on my arrival was gone. No mower no trimmers no rakes just a big yellow sign hanging from fishing line from the ceiling announcing the Grand Opening of the TOILET PAPER PALACE

I scratched my head and looked at the corner of the store that just yesterday housed the garden center but was now filled to the ceiling with what appeared to be cases and cases of toilet paper. Big Earl came out from behind a wall of double strength, double padded flower print toilet paper with his arms outstretched and a smile on his face, " Welcome to the Toilet Paper Palace" I was speechless and before I could say anything Earl went into a well-practiced sales pitch on how he was now offering toilet paper in case lots, at a discount mind you to his customers. I raised my hand with a single finger pointed in the air to get his attention but he put an arm on my shoulder and walked me down a aisle of toilet paper.

Single rolls, double rolls, triple rolls. Rolls in fragrance, padded rolls. Flower prints with matching paper towels, single strength, double strength, industrial strength. Single strength single rolls he stopped to take a breath and I interpreted him, Earl I need a spindle for my garden tractor. He patted me on the back and waved his arm to follow him, I did. He continued his pitch, four packs six packs, twelve packs and of course right now the best deal is on the full cases of blaze orange or camouflage. With that we made a turn around some zebra paper to find the lawn and garden order desk. I must admit I was getting a little worried there but a minute later and I had a new spindle on order and was working my way back to the front of the store through the toilet paper maze. I arrived back at the cabin to the smell of cookies in the air and the wife hearing me at the door shouted out "Are you back" I closed the door and shouted out "Yes" the wife came out from the kitchen with all three dogs closely behind her, "You took off so fast I was going to tell you we are running low on toilet paper" from Lake Iwanttobethere {839,612}

[Bobby Bass]

Rain day, nothing wrong with rain days I guess. Baseball teams have rain days and they just kind of sit back and take a break. The game will get played somewhere down the road but just not that day. Yesterday was a rain day for me. Just sat back in one of the wood deck chairs just inside the shop's roll up door. Cool and windy out, did I mention windy. If there are any leaves left on trees today it is not that the wind did not try and take them off yesterday. The only trees with leaves at my place are the apple trees, still green and still hanging on. As I sat with the roll up door open I had a little fire going in the pot belly stove. More then enough little scrap pieces of wood laying around to feed the fire. With the little stove heating the shop and the wind coming from the other side of the open door it was comfortable inside out of the wind.

Bud Barney and Duncan all took turns coming out and sitting for a spell with me. But I was just kicked back sitting on the deck chair with my feet up resting on a bucket blowing the occasional smoke ring from a cigar and they soon got bored with me. They would made the dash from the cabin to the shop avoiding the rain except for Duncan. Duncan would make the trip to the shop like he was a kid coming home from school, everything was a distraction. Steady drip of rain coming of the eves to splatter on the ground and the sound of some branches scraping the roof. Will have to add tree trimming to the Honey Do List.

Edd and Eddie the squirrels look like they have some relatives moving in on them. With the leaves all but gone from the trees I noticed several new nests in the maples. I sat on the deck chair and watched the nests from time to time for some movement but I am guessing the squirrels are also having a rain day. I made the mistake of bring the lap top out to the shop and from time to time I would get up and add a few things to the do list. In the old days the do list was just something you kept in your head and pretty much forgot about till something broke that was suppose to be fixed on the do list. The list then went to paper and that worked a little better but sometimes the list could get misplaced and you were back to using the list in your head. Now we have the list on the lap top and the wife routinely prints it off to replace the paper ones that seem to get lost or coffee spilled on.

The do lists are good things and I bet on one of them do lists I had "greasing the spindles on the lawn tractor". Maybe if I had greased the spindle I would not be waiting on a part, I got up from the chair and added grease mower spindles to next fall master do list. Of course there are other lists on the lap top, hidden in a secret file marked, well I can't really tell you that as the wife does read my ramblings from time to time. But there is a list of lakes I want to fish and some new lures that I should buy. Directions to Wrong Lake is in there along with a map of the new grouse haunts that Duncan and I have been hunting. Nothing wrong with rain days as I spent the afternoon working on my do lists. I think the wife would like me to spend more time on the done lists though, from Lake Iwanttobethere {840,252}

[Bobby Bass]

Another good day to hunker down in the cabin, I got a fire going and a sweater on. Wind is blowing strong and the wind chimes outside the door are banging away. Rain drops splatter on the glass and run down in vertical rivers. Today will not be mistaken for a warm summer morning with a light breeze and wind chimes tinkling away, I think we are done with those days for awhile. Yesterday afternoon I picked up three of the grand kids from school and took them over to Tess's shop so they could pick up their Halloween costumes. They climbed into the Tahoe and the ten year old girl announced that "Papa your truck smells" I replied with "Of course it smells, it has kids in it" My grandson from the back seat says "It smells like you"

I pulled away from school wondering to myself if that is a good thing or a bad thing. I could vaguely remember my grandfather, Lucky Strike cigarette smoke and Aqua Velva lotion and rubbed my nose at the thought. The other grandson spoke up saying that he likes the smell of the truck, it smells like cigars and Duncan. " So you think the truck smells bad?" I asked and they all at the same time said that no the truck smells good and they like the smell of cigars, and Duncan and the beach. "Beach, what smells like beach?" I asked. Number one grandson said " I can smell the lake back here." The conversation changed to what they were wearing for costumes and I dropped them off at Tess's where the other granddaughter and her mother were waiting.

I drove away sniffing the air of the truck and trying to place the smells. No cigar smoke, I had not been smoking around the kids and I had cleaned out the ash tray, I suppose it could be on the leather seats. Duncan was a given as his moving blanket covered the back of the Tahoe. I suppose there is some dried mud from his paws back there. The beach or lake part was the hard one that took a little while to figured out. When I launch the Puddle Humper I store the knee high boots behind my seat and they sit on a tray. I suppose after a summer of fishing there is sand and dried lake bottom on the tray and the carpet. I could also smell a few things the kids did not mention, A whiff of gunpowder from some shot twenty gage shells that were resting in the cup holder. A bag of salted worms that were half open and half gone wedged along the passengers front seat. The bag of Kit Kat candy bars hidden in the center console.

I drove sniffing the air in the truck and decided that I liked the way the truck smells. Now the wife's Jeep, that is a different story, scented tissue and perfume in there. I give her a hard time because she will stop off at the fast food burger place and leave her bag in the Jeep. The smell of catsup in the sun with left over French fries lingers for a long time if you ask me.

The new car smell has been long gone in the Tahoe and I don't smell the leather seats anymore. Most of the time the windows are rolled down and the truck is filled with the smell of Pine and not from some fake little tree hanging from a mirror. True there is some cigar smoke from the ones I burn on the way to a lake to go fishing but, well OK I guess that smell might linger in the truck. Then there is the smell of Coney's with extra onions wrapped in wax paper in a white paper bag that I forgot about. But I happen to like the smell of Coney's and melted Kit Kat candy bars. Maybe I should stop at the car wash and vacuum the Tahoe out but it did not happen yesterday.

So today I watch the wind move branches and looking out at the yard I wonder where all the leaves have gone. The lake is stirred up and waves are moving across the bay all heading away from me. I am guessing the shore over there has a lot of leaves and someone is standing at there cabin window looking in my direction and thinking kind thoughts about their new found wealth of leaves, from Lake Iwanttobethere {840,699}

[Bobby Bass]

A Halloween Tale

The light from the burning split birch danced across the old face of Elmer as he sat in the Lodge in his favorite wicker chair. One of those evenings where old men feel their age and the warmth of the fire can never be close enough. Weathered hands and enlarged knuckles from years of hard work held the white mug in a relaxed but secure grip. On this night there was no alcohol just fresh apple cider with a lonely cinnamon stick that was used to stir the warm cider. Outside the falling rain was turning into small snowflakes, the temperature was dropping just like on that night.

Elmer did not sit alone, there were others with him. Doc Burriem was there dressed in black as he always is. His black felt derby hat rested on the arm of the chair that he too had pulled close to the fire. His ankles crossed his pants had pulled up a tad to show the shine on his well worn black wing tip shoes. The suit was old but well kept, no one really knows if he had but the one or twenty-one of them. His black medical bag sat close at hand on the floor next to him. Doc is pretty much retired and has been for awhile but people still call him and he still comes. Tonight he to was sitting with a mug in his hands but his did not just hold cider. Doc would add a little something from time to time to the mug from a silver flask that he kept in his vest.

With the sound of the crackling fire you had to listen hard for the creaking of the oak rocking chair. It rocked slowly and surprisingly quietly for the bulk that it was holding. Earl senior sat in the chair, his flannel shirt poking out between the spindles looking almost like they were trying to escape. A big, meaty hand cradled a beer mug half full or half empty depending on how you looked at it. With the rocking the beer foam moved from one side of the mug and then back to the other side. In his other hand it looked like a finger was smoking till you saw that it was a fat cigar that just looked like one of his fingers.

There used to be a forth who would come and sit at the fire with them on these nights but she has passed. The four of them would sit and remember and drink cider except for Earl senior who does not really care for cider preferring cold beer as his choice. Most if not all of the Lodge members know the story, some better then others. The four of them now three have been sitting around the fire for years and when they are ready or someone asked they will retell the story from their past. The Lodge is quiet on this night I am guessing the storm has kept people sitting at home in front of their own fire light. A bright flash of light streaks through the rain splattered windows and before I can finish blinking my eyes the clap of thunder rattles the glass and the over head lights flicker once and then we are plunged into darkness. {841,476}

[Bobby Bass]

Chapter Two

There was a pause in the night as we all sat tight, no one moving waiting for the return of the light. A log in the fire crackle out loudly or so it seemed and someone moved in their chair, the leg scraping the wood floor of the Lodge needlessly. Standing behind the bar I turn my head towards the wall where the meter was for our back up power. The black metal box had four green lights and I knew that Windy the windmill was still working on this night. I took a few quiet steps and flipped just the one switch that lit up the back bar. The rope lighting that we had installed now glowed somewhat brightly and was reflected off the bottles and the mirror on the wall. The light splattered outward, diffused by green glass and amber liquids in clear bottles. It gave the room a glow I was later told.

No one moved at least that I could see as we waiting for our eyes to get adjust to the diminished visibility. Time moved as quickly as a second hand on a broken clock and just as quietly. With enough light to see by Vinnie the new bus boy made his way down the bar to me. He had on jeans with a white apron over a white tee shirt and a small gold chain with a cross dangling freely over his chest. His shift was over and he was waiting on his girl to pick him up, but she was late again, not one of her better traits but then you have not seen the rest of her. Vinnie reached for the light switches but I brushed his hand away and whispered "Let's just see what happens" Vinnie nodded his head and moved the wood toothpick from one side of his mouth to the other.

Vinnie untied his apron and dropped it into the cardboard linen box behind the bar. He then poured himself a club soda from the cobra at the bar and made his way quiet like to a small table by the fire. The four guys playing cribbage picked up their cards and board and moved to a table closer to the light from the fire. Hammering Hank and Skinny had been carving pumpkins at a big table and I must admit they had been doing a little drinking at the same time. Gus came through the swinging door of the kitchen holding a candle in a black iron old fashion candle holder. I chuckled to myself some as for some reason the Lodge's cook looked like Ebenezer Scrooge in a white night shirt. Setting the candle holder on the bar he reached down and picked up the cardboard box of dirty linen and placed it on the bar. Where the box once was he now pulled out a box of candles and carried them over to Hank's table. Skinny put a match to some of the candles and placed them inside the already carved pumpkins. Hank moved the pumpkins around the room and once again we had light.

Another flash of lightning lit up the bar and caught the patrons frozen for just a sec. The old guys at the fire had not moved but Vinnie was caught making the signs of the cross. The most disturbing sight was Hammering Hank and Skinny standing covered in orange pumpkin slime holding knifes. Seeds and pulp on their arms they were back carving up two more for the yard. Eyes blinked and adjusted again and that is when we heard Elmer start to speak, solemnly....

[Bobby Bass]

Chapter Three

Elmer pointing his partially dissolved cinnamon stick at Vinnie and said " I was just about your age when it all happen" and Earl senior and Doc Burriem nodded their heads together in agreement. It was a Halloween night and just like tonight it was a dark and stormy night. The year before everyone had been fooled by the aliens who were reported to have landed that night. Orson Wells was his name and he sure did play quite a trick with his story of War of the Worlds that people still tell. It was 1938 and I was scarred to hell but these others won't admit it because they never heard it because I had a radio and they didn't. Earl senior and Doc chuckled a little at the old memory. Elmer was forgetting the part about him trying to convince them about the Martians landing.

Vinnie leaned a little forward in his chair, he had seen the movie but never met anyone who had lived the tale. Vinnie waited for some more but the three old men had gone quiet again, they sat in their chairs and looked deep into the fire. Earl senior rocking slowly back and forth with a little creaking noise every now and then. Skinny was done with a pumpkin and he used his knife to slowly scrape the pulp from the pumpkin off his arms and hands. He walked towards the fire in his blue farmer's bibs and made not a noise in his soft leather boots. Moving the screen he stirred the fire and added some wood to make the flames grow higher. Dancing flames grew large as the bark on the wood caught resulting in more light to catch everyone looking into the fire.

Doc was the next to speak and he did it quietly. It was the Halloween after the big Halloween and yes it was a night like tonight, the five of us were out trick or treating. Now you must remember this was long ago, we didn't have a car we had to walk or we didn't get to go. Tricks were a big thing then as you can only eat so many apples and sugar dumplings. Cow tipping and moving outhouses were no big deal, just don't get caught as anything goes on a Halloween night. Ellie used to tell it right, after all it was her cousin that was lost that night.

Smiles all appeared on everyone at the mention of Ellie's name, she was the fourth who would sit at the fire. I am old enough to remember a young Ellie and Earl senior now spoke as he always had a thing for her. Earl turned slightly to capture Vinnie in his gaze and said "The five of us were walking into town that night, Doc and Elmer on my right and Ellie and her cousin Mary a few steps behind. Even bundled up in her heavy wool coat Mary was a sight to see. Even back then she was described as having a shape like an hour glass with a couple of extra minutes in just the right places." Earl paused and looked back into the fire like he was remembering Mary. Doc turned to Vinnie and said "Say son, isn't your girl's name Mary?" Vinnie holding his club soda replied "Yes, but my Mary has red hair" "Hmmm, what a coincidence, so did our Mary" Elmer muttered quietly to no one in particular.

[Bobby Bass]

Chapter Four

" O, don't mind him" Doc said to Vinnie, "Lots of pretty girls have had red hair." And with that Doc stood and turned away from the fire. Using the shuffle step that old guys do he made his way to the bar where I added some cider to his mug and a couple of shots of brandy to his flask. As I turned to put the bottle away he pointed at his mug and I poured away. The four guys playing cards had left them on the cloth and in various positions they now sat around the table. Gus came back from the kitchen where he had shut everything down and walked through the swinging door and paused. He took his Scrooge candle holder and placed it on the bar and reached into the cooler for a Hamms and the pickled egg jar. Unscrewing the lid he grabbed two for himself and looked at me, I just shook my head.

Ellie told the story best and she and the boys would sit at the fire and only come Halloween would they spread the tale. Ellie past a few years back and now it was up to just the three of them to keep the story going. Elmer looked at Vinnie and told him just that. "Do you think you are up to it" he asked Vinnie. Vinnie fiddling with his gold cross and trying to look tuff said "Bring it on, it's just a story I have been told, that you old guys have been teasing me with since the day I started here." "OK" said Elmer but just so you know, that girl of yours sure does look a lot like Mary did.

So Elmer the sober one of the three of them starting telling the Tale. As he spoke guys moved closer as Elmer talked in a quiet, well thought out breath. Gus moved from the back of the bar to a chair closer to the fire. I moved down the bar and moved the linen box down to the waitress station. I sat on a stool and leaned on the bar I didn't want to miss any of this yarn. Elmer turn his chair a tad to face Vinnie better and began his tale. "So the five of us were walking down Elm road named after a big Elm that sat at a curve. If you rode a horse or buggy it was not much of a deal but the new cars of them days had a problem sometime and bits of bark were missing from behind hit with steel. The tree is gone now and the road is paved but I still can remember that road to this day.

Some light rain had been falling but as the dim light of day disappeared the rain turn to small snow flakes. If you turn to look at where you had just passed you could see your tracks. I was puffing on a rolled cigarette that I had found and Doc even back then was giving me grief about smoking. Hats were pulled down tight and the girls had scarfs covering their hair, it was almost dark when I heard the clopping of hooves and little horse whinny. From behind us there came an old wood wagon pile high with hay. No head lights in them days but a lantern hung from a pole so the horse could see the way. We all five moved to the side to make way. When the horse was abreast it was rein in and we heard a fellow say "Whoa" Then a voice directed at us asked if he could be a help in anyway.

[Bobby Bass]

Ok I am having a problem with my laptop and that is where the rest of the tale is at. Rather then rewriting most of the tale I am just going to let it die here. But in short the tale is all about a prank that everyone in the Lodge is in on and it is played out at Vinnie the new bus boy's expense. His girlfriend is in on it and in the end her head is found by Vinnie in the linen box

[Bobby Bass]

Getting to be that time of the year for sure. This morning I woke up and had to head into town to the General Store for some chain. Grand daughter's birthday and I am putting in a swing in her back yard. Was doing some tree trimming over there and I found the perfect limb that hangs out into the yard but I don't have enough chain for the seat that I bought. So I was up before the sun had a chance to melt the frost of the windshield. After letting the Tahoe heat up some Duncan hopped up in the truck and we headed out. Duncan for a change is on the good side of the wife. She was washing clothes in the basement and a tiny mouse ran out from under the dryer. Duncan I am told pounced on it and held it in his mouth. The wife told Duncan "To take that little rodent outside" and Duncan did. I happen to hear the yelling and when Duncan came up the stairs I open the deck door and out he went. He took a few steps and sat down, lower his head and let the mouse out. Kind of like Jonah and the whale, now the wife tells Duncan to go look for Jonah when they are down in the basement.

On the home front did not have a good day Monday. That time of year for things to break get fixed and then have something else break. New spindle came in for the lawn tractor so that was put on and the deck was mounted back on the tractor, but to late in the day to do any mowing. So I was in the kitchen and with the wife's help we took the wall mounted microwave over the stove down. Thing had fried and we had bought a countertop replacement. After the microwave was down I went to take the wall cabinet that it was hung from down to do some wall patching. That didn't work so well as the wife was trying to talk me into just painting the kitchen and was distracted when the last screw was undone.

The cabinet came off the wall with me holding onto the screw gun and the cabinet, her end got away from her and I was now trying to race the cabinet to the floor going down the ladder. I missed the last step dropped the cabinet and fell shoulder first into the countertop. Dropped the screw gun on the foot that I had just twisted and hit the floor just in time to watch the ladder do a slow-motion fall and hit the other counter where the laptop was resting, open and on the Honey Do List page. Lap top crashed to the floor, laptop is now with the son in law who at last report said that the laptop "Was having issues" Some things were not backed up and got lost including the Honey Do List, dang.

Yesterday afternoon the sun came out and it looked warmer then what it was. I put on the insulated bibs and spent the afternoon riding the lawn tractor and mulching leaves. I took a break and came into the cabin where the wife declared that I smelled pretty earthy. Might have to do with all the powered leaf dust all over me. I was down by the water when Nytelyter came trolling by on his pontoon. I was surprised to see someone out fishing and I stopped mowing and we yelled at each other across the water for awhile. I think I only heard about half of what he was saying but he held up a four pound walleye for me to see and that kind of filled in what I had been missing. He was telling me I should be out fishing from Lake Iwanttobethere {845,079}

[Bobby Bass]

Bobby has gone to deer camp.

Since the laptop is still at our son in laws being worked on he could not bring it with him to write so we are doing it war correspondence style.

Unknown to most but Chuck our neighbor besides rasing them chickens with the noisy rooster also has some carrier pigeons. Several were taken to deer camp and the plan I was told is to sent back highlights to me here to share. The reports although small are numbered so I can keep them in order. I have already checked the loft several times this morning and have found a few short lines to share.

Also I was talking with Chucks girlfriend who informed me that not all the pigeons that Bobby and Chuck took with are carrier pigeons and the pigeons are really her hobby. So it looks like not all the information from deer camp is going to make it back to you.

Before Bobby left he instructed me to write down and post exactly what he has written and not add anything. But since I am doing all the hard work I may add a comment or two, Bobby's Wife

First report from deer camp.......... We have all arrived, supper was good, a few more mice then usually, heavy frost this morning.

Second report?

Third report, did you get first and second reports? Second report bird when it took off went the wrong way, I think.

Now how am I supposed to answer him? From the cabin at Lake Iwanttobethere

[Bobby Bass]

Deer camp, by Bobby's Wife

Spent time with Chuck's girlfriend most of last evening, I mean we have exchanged waves over the fence but with me going over and checking the loft for messages it seemed only right that I should bring over a bottle of wine.

Sammy dug out her chocolate fountain and we had a lovely time dipping fruit into it and chatting but I don't thing that Bobby's friends really want to hear what we were doing.

So here is what I have received.

Message number six: ]Chuck has informed me about the birds not really his, he thinks that some of the birds are from his gf's cousin that lives in Iowa. Might be what they head South on release.[/

Message number seven: Chuck dropped an 8 pointer at dusk! Note this bird smelled like it took a bath in Hamms

Message number eight: 8 pointer is in camp, had a fire last night. Was on the deer stand an hour early this morning, forgot about daylight savings.

Message number ten: need more birds, will try and climb big Pine to see if I can get cell coverage this afternoon

Bobby's wife, from the cabin at Lake Iwanttobethere

[Bobby Bass]

So a picture says a thousand words,here is the ten pointer from last night !

[Bobby Bass]

You never miss a hot shower until you have not had one for a few days. Returned to the cabin last night after being at deer camp for the past few days. I am usually greeted by the wife at the door with a peck on the cheek but instead she handed me a bar of Irish Spring soap. I swear Bud and Barney just nodded at me and kept their distance. Duncan of course jumped up and tugged at my hand, at least someone was happy to see me. Chuck and I came into town as we had two fine bucks to drop off at Ma and Pa's walk-in cooler. We had called in as soon as we had gotten far enough away from deer camp to get cell phone reception on Chucks phone. There was no way I was going to get any reception on my phone as it was missing a few pieces after falling from the big pine back at the deer camp.

This morning after the second shower in twelve hours I feel and I have been told that I smell a lot better. Bud and Barney have even let me get close enough to rub them behind the ears this morning. I guess having a bottle of doe urine leak inside a pant's pocket can have an odor effect on a guy. With my laptop still not working there was no way I was going to be able to text stories from my phone back home to the wife for her to post. I hope you were able to follow some of the weekend's adventures. The homing pigeons we both thought were going to be a good idea except for a few things that Chuck forgot to mention. Like they were really his girlfriends Sammy's hobby and just because you occasionally feed them does not mean they are going to listen to you. It would have also helped to know that some of the birds were from Iowa where it appears they headed when they were released. We also found out that Eagles like homing pigeons and they use the little message sleeves as toothpicks.

So briefly the gang all showed up at deer camp or the Hotel as we like to call it on Friday evening. There was a mix up in scheduling and the group that was to arrive early actually arrived late so nothing was ready. An old squirrel nest was found in the stove pipe but not till after the fire was started. That worked out OK as the smoke helped coax a lot of mice out of the Hotel that we didn't have enough traps for anyway. The porcupine after dark in the outhouse was another matter and it was not until Sunday afternoon guys were comfortable going out there. The portable loft for the carrier pigeons caught the attention of an eagle which had taken up residence in the big pine. I didn't find that out till I was climbing the pine trying to get cell reception for my phone. Guess the eagle has a problem with what she considered a home invasion.

Between all of the excitement an eight point buck on Saturday and a ten pointer on Sunday were brought into camp. Wish we had some snow as both Chuck and I are getting too old to be dragging deer. I am hoping to pick up the repaired laptop today and will have some time at the Hotel to write a proper update on the happenings of opening weekend, Unless of course something else happens. Today it is raining and Stormy Clearweather is calling for it to change into snow, seems a little warm for that to me but as I write this I am starting to see a few flakes fall. A few of the carrier pigeons remand AWOL I have not told Chuck that when I was in the big pine tree I might have seen a few remains in the eagle nest, I am guessing they were from the pigeons as I found the little back packs they wear. From what I heard last night he is already in enough trouble with his girlfriend. Good thing there are still ten days of season left as Chuck may be looking for a place to sleep, Make sure you get out and vote and we will chat later, from Lake Iwanttobethere {850,203}

[Bobby Bass]

No real rush getting back to deer camp today as it is damp out. When I was younger and my bones didn't talk as loudly as they do now a little dampness in the air was a good sign. Wet trees and leaves make smells linger that even I can smell. I envy the dogs and their noses as they get to smell all of the woods all the time. Let the dogs out this morning and did a quick survey, nothing changed since yesterday. Walked over to Elmers and checked his dock and his doors. He is still at deer camp and I imagine he will be there the rest of the week. He and Marv are looking for a decent size doe to share. The Hotel has but a few simple rules and one of them is in order to share meat you have to be at the Hotel when it is harvested.

A ten and eight point buck were harvested along with a small doe. Everybody at camp on opening weekend will get something to put in their freezer. Later this afternoon Chuck and I will make the drive in the Dodge and haul up some supplies and some plywood to make a new door for the outhouse. The guys don't want to share the building with porcupines, will also be bring up some more mouse traps. It would appear that it was a banner season for mice at the hotel this fall. I know I did not get up there but in my defense someone else was on the schedule to check on it and I just didn't grouse hunt up that way. After spending time out on the swamp stand Duncan and I will return after deer season and do a little bird hunting. I saw several birds and some of the other guys also reported seeing birds and spoke about them at the supper table.

No snow, thought we were going to get some but it warmed up just enough to keep the rain from turning from drops to flakes. No sunshine though, just lot of overcast sky which means dark mornings and even quicker sunsets. With everything being damp and not getting a chance to dry out it just feels a little colder in the stand. Opening morning we had a hard frost and when we filed out of the Hotel to head to our stands we left tracks. Leaves crunched under foot and hid branches that cracked like gunshots when stepped on. Of course everything is loud when you trying to be quiet. With no one up early at the hotel it took a day for the place to finally warm up. The air was warm after a few hours and once the smoke cleared from the plugged stack we were back inside unpacking. Checking the chimney pipe has now been highlighted on the do list but it still took a day to really warm up the walls and furniture.

A few members of the group could only stay the weekend they had to return to work. A few more guys will return next weekend and a few more guys will stay this week and maybe next week to. I will go back and forth spending a few days at the Hotel then coming back to the cabin for a hot shower and clean clothes. Nice thing about being retired now and being close to the Hotel, I can come and go as I please. I also don't like being away from Bud, Barney and of course Duncan for too long and if the wife is reading this of course her to.

Laptop is fixed and that will be coming up to camp with me, should be able to jot down a few thoughts and maybe there might even be a few stories to share. Carrier pigeons will not be going back to deer camp and Chucks girlfriend has informed him he can stay at camp as long as he wants. Foolishly he thanked her for being so understanding and left her a list of chores to do while he is gone. Will be interesting to see if his chickens and his girlfriend are still there when he returns, from Lake Iwanttobethere {851,381}

[Bobby Bass]

Fifty-one degrees out, a month ago fishing in the Puddle Humper that might have been considered cold after a few hours. Today sitting on the small front porch of the deer shack, also known as the Hotel it was mighty nice. Spent a few hours out on the swamp stand in the morning, it was wet, quiet and lonely. By ten Chuck and I were working on replacing the outhouse door which became a bigger project after finding out the wood that held the old hinges was pretty much rotted away. We borrowed a few two by fours from a bed inside the Hotel that was not going to be needed till the weekend to make repairs. Replacing the outhouse door was more important then the unused bed, we just have to remember to bring some lumber back with us the next time we head into town.

Early afternoon now and Chuck was out on his stand, Elmer and Marv were inside taking naps. The two of them had spent time on stands in the morning and were going to go back out later in the afternoon. After bowls of chili they had both decided to kick back and get a nap in. I was sitting on the front porch in the old wood rocker in full sunshine. The door was cracked a little as it is quieter going in and out without having to use the latch. The two guys were sleeping like old guys do, well guys that are older then me do. Marv was sitting in the square backed flowered chair with a pillow tucked behind the small of his back. Elmer was sprawled on the couch, one leg hanging over the side with his wool stocking foot resting on the floor. Both were snoring but not together, the sound was like a big cross buck saw working a white pine. One was taking a breath in while the other was letting it out.

As for me I was sitting in the old wood rocker that was weathered but still serviceable. My 30-30 was leaning up against the rail because one should never be in hunting camp without a rifle close at hand. Take Big Earl for example, two years ago Big Earl was using the outhouse early in the morning, he had gotten a late start and everyone else had already headed out to their stands. He dropped his day pack and stood his rifle up against the wall of the Hotel when he felt the call of nature. He was only in the outhouse for a few minutes and when he open the door to leave he was face to face with a ten point buck. This year when he retold the story the buck was all of twelve points, but I suppose in two years it might have grown. Big Earl does not go to the outhouse without his rifle any more and he is the reason why there is a gun rack in there now.

So I was sitting in the rocker and enjoying the sunshine, the Hotel was blocking what little breeze there was and it was nice doing nothing. A little nap was in my future but mostly I was just having some good thoughts. You see before I came up to the Hotel my oldest daughter called me and told me I was going to have another grand kid. I have not shared it with the guys at deer camp just yet but I will maybe later. Sitting in the old rocker with the sun at my face the old guys sounded like babies sleeping. Not ready to go out hunting just yet, I am afraid the deer will hear the big smile on my face, from Lake Iwanttobethere {852.596}

[Bobby Bass]

Forty-one degrees out, at least that is what I can see through the rain covered window of the Hotel. The big round thermometer hanging on the porch post with a deer jumping over a log is hard to read with the rain falling. No one on stands this morning and this afternoon looks like everyone will be staying close to camp. Last night no one saw anything as the deer were hiding somewhere where we were not looking. Wind was the problem last night as it was so windy that most of the guys stayed out of the tree top stands. Junior was the only one and he was complaining last night of motion sickness. DOC Burriem told him he would be fine it was just the tree swaying from side to side in the thirty mile winds that had him a little woozy.

This morning the sound of thunder woke everyone up. In various stages of sleeping apparel guys made the walk to a window, looked out saw blowing branches and rain splattering the glass. Not enough light to see far but they saw far enough. On auto pilot they made their way back to bunks and still warm sleeping bags. I stirred the fire in the stove and woke up the coals, added a few pieces of Maple and clanked the door closed. Breakfast was going to be delayed as I to returned to the bunk and my sleeping bag.

By nine I could sleep no more, usually Saturdays are my days to sleep in but here at the Hotel the snoring of the guys was too hard to block out with just the one pillow. So I got dressed and tossed another chunk of wood into the stove. Put on a raincoat over the flannel and tugged my hat down on my head and headed out to the old rocker on the porch. Everything was wet including the siding on the wall, the wind had driven the rain everywhere. I went back inside the hotel and found one of them orange fanny seats and brought it outside. With the seat on the rocker I sat down and dug into my pocket for a cigar and lighter. With flame to the gar I was soon blowing smoke and watching the wind grab it and take it away around the porch. Deer season was turning interesting as the weather was doing it's part. Only a few a few sunny days, lots of cloudy ones and wind never seemed to be too far away. Think we have received more rain in the past week then we have in the past few months.

I sat on the old rocker and smoked my cigar, had to keep my hand cupped around it to keep the occasional stray rain drop from hitting it. No longer raining hard but still dripping from the eves of the Hotel. Water coming off the pines from the wind hit the metal roof of the porch as big drops then echoing down to me. With the cigar half gone I could hear stirring in the Hotel. Scrapping of chairs and the clanking of the wood stove's door. Some muffling talking and a little laughter at someone expense I am sure. Big Earl came out holding an umbrella and his rifle, nodding at me he said "Morning" and took the short trail to the outhouse. Someone turned the AM radio on and Sunshine Ray's voice could be heard talking of wind and rain for the rest of the day. With barely enough cigar left to hold in my teeth I stood up, took off the rain coat and shook off the water. I entered the Hotel and hung the rain coat on a peg and tossed my stump of a cigar into the potbelly stove. "So who is ready for a little friendly card game?" I asked, from Lake Iwanttobethere {853,539}

[Bobby Bass]

A little snow on the deck this morning and some small flakes are floating down in no hurry to reach the ground. The wind which has been a constant companion at the Hotel is quiet back here at the cabin. Came back home shortly after dark last night as the weekend was a bust hunting wise. A few does were seen by the group but none shot as they were all pretty small. Elmer and Marv are still at camp and I think they just like to be there rather then here. Gus from the Lodge will be going up for the last week and I will take over the apron for him this week. Things are quiet so it should be an easy week for me. Gus is taking Vinne up with him and it will be Vinnie's first experience at deer hunting and spending time with the old coots.

A few cold days in store for us and then it will warm up back into the low forties which is good, have things to do outside still. The Puddle Humper did get put away for the winter. Everything was taken out and it has been tarped. Some more firewood needs to be hauled down to the cabin and stacked in the rack. Hammering Hank will be hauling me a couple of loads of wood in next week. I am good for this year but we have to start on next year's pile and the wood split's better when it is cold out. Even though Chuck has a splitter I still like to swing an axe from time to time, I like the sound of a blade going through wood to bury itself into the old stump that I use as a chopping block. I have my splitting maul but that is getting a little heavy and if I need a maul then that means more work then I want to do. I won't even bring up wedges and the sledgehammer, those tools are for son's to work with.

The best wood for splitting in my opinion is ash, especial the chunks that are about six to eight inches in diameter. Set them up on the chopping block and they just about split themselves when you flash the blade at them. On a day like today where the temperature is in the mid twenties they split easy and fall off the block and almost stack themselves. The most enjoyable might be a nice chunk of Birch that you can walk around in a circle and just take off slivers to make kindling with. If you have done any kind of wood splitting you know what I mean, it can be very relaxing.

Making kindling with a little hatchet camping is fine but splitting wood with an axe is where it is at. The sound of an axe striking wood and the thunk it makes echoing back at you plays a part, you can tell by the thunk if it is ready to come apart. The sound of the axe hitting the chunk then driving through to the chopping block, the chuck splitting into pieces in protest that then fall off the block to hit other pieces already on the ground with that wooden clinking sound.

I like to keep the bigger pieces around for thanksgiving, while we wait for supper to go on the table I will mention in a round about way on how I must be getting older or the wood is just getting tougher. With a little coaxing I soon have the brother in laws putting on coats and heading outside to show me how to split the "Hardwood." I will nod and act impressed as they work up a sweat and sometimes I can even get them to stack it to. After all, what are brother in laws good for? From Lake Iwanttobethere {854,561}

[Bobby Bass]

I sometimes forget how busy the day can get but having spent a week at deer camp and then returning home I am soon reminded. Lucky for me I get to go back to deer camp tomorrow as Gus is done, he shot a doe yesterday and hauled it into Ma and Pa's late last night. This morning when I arrived at the Lodge Gus already had the lights on and the grill warming up. We sat at the bar and ate bacon and eggs with a couple of ten inch pancakes dripping in butter and Lake Iwanttobethere Maple Syrup. Between sips of orange juice Gus told me of how he was just waking up from a nap in the swamp stand. He open one eye first and then the other and looked around just moving his eyes. A nice doe stood broadside to him not twenty yards away and Gus said he was already eyeing steaks and a nice roast. The hard part was the drag back as he didn't want to wake Elmer and Marv from their naps.

We discussed about what he was going to do and Gus said he would rather save some vacation days for ice fishing and I gave him his apron back. Friday will be a work day at the Hotel as some of the guys will come in early before the last weekend to do some chores. There is wood to be cut and split for next season and Big Earl is going to bring up a paint sprayer. We or Earl is going to stain the outhouse and the replacement door and maybe the Hotel porch. Stormy Clearweather is calling for rising temperatures and if the sun is out the stain might even dry. Chuck and I replaced the two by fours on the one bunk and now the guys are saying it is not fair that one bed got fixed and not the others. Rather then going and buying more two by fours Chuck cut some Pine on the wood mill he has and we will bring them to the Hotel. Until the wood dries out the bunks will have a little spring to them and the Hotel will have that new wood smell to it again.

On the home front the wife has wrote a new Honey Do List to replace the lost one. She wrote this one in a smaller font so as to make it look like it was the same size as the lost one. I returned it to the correct font and she had added at least half a page of chores to the list! Looking over the list I see she had forgotten several things but I was not going to say anything to her. What I have been doing is deleting one of her projects and replacing it with one of my projects that has already been completed. Yesterday I changed the oil on the Tahoe and replaced her "Beating Rugs" with it. I saw her looking over the list as I peeked from behind the Lake Iwanttobethere Times. She almost said something but I spoke first saying that today I was going to clean out the shop before I headed up to the Hotel tomorrow.

So after leaving the Lodge I headed to Big Earl's to confirm he was bring the paint sprayer. Off to Amy's Bakery for some French bread and then to the Gas-N-Go to fill up and wash my windows. Got a little sidetracked by the Fellows as they were headed as a group to Dug's Garage, they had some new idea about installing car alarms in their trucks. I think something had already gone wrong with their plan as they were all walking. I made a mental note to find out more when I return from deer camp on Sunday, from Lake Iwanttobethere {856,833}

[Bobby Bass]

Packing the Tahoe this morning getting ready to leave for deer camp when I received some bad news. Was checking my e-mail for the last time when I found out that Hostess, the makers of Twinkies and Ding Dongs are going out of business. I called Pa at Ma and Pa's Grocery Store to see if he had any in stock that I could pick up on my way to the Hotel and he told me for some strange reason he had a rush of hunters in this morning and his shelf's were cleaned out. I relayed the information about the closing and he cut me off, said he was going to call his wholesaler and see if he could get an order in. I dialed the Gulp-N-Go and the clerk answered before I could ask "That we have no Twinkies and we have no Ding Dongs" I hit the speed dial for the General Store and Barb answered. We exchanged Hiya's and I asked about Ding Dongs and she told me I was too late, Shelves were empty and Big Earl was already gone and headed to the hotel.

Bad news seems to always travel faster then good news and it was not even worth calling any other shops in town. The Twinkies and Ding Dongs are gone and just like that memories of the tasty snacks came back. Brown paper bag lunches were not complete without a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with a Twinkie in the bottom of the sack. Riding your old bike with playing cards clicking away on the spokes along the dirt road heading to the fishing hole. Stopping for a break, and dividing up a Ding Dong from a two bag pack with your fishing buddy. Sitting in a deer stand trying to be quiet opening the cold crackling cellophane wrapped around a frozen Twinkie and looking around to see if anyone could hear you. It was almost a given that in your day pack you have a Twinkie or two, sure nowadays there may be some granola bars and some bottled water but if you dig deep enough there would be a Twinkie in there somewhere. I can't count how many fishing or hunting trips where there was only enough time to snack on a Ding Dong or a Twinkie. They always came in twos so you got one and your partner or the dog got the other.

I mean Twinkies lasted forever! They even had them in bomb shelters. You could live on water and Twinkies and maybe pizza and some beer. OK maybe you might need some oranges to keep the scurvy away but you get my drift. I went to the kitchen and checked all the hidden spots that the wife likes to hide goodies. She sometimes rations my treats saying she is keeping them from the grand kids. The wife finding me standing on a chair checking the top of the cabinets asked me what I was doing. I tell her I am in search of Ding Dongs and she makes some quiet comment about me being a ding dong and then tells me the grand kids got the last ones from the box and she needs to buy some more. She does not know and I shake my head at her, I ask her to take a seat and I climb down from mine.

I sit at the table across from her and I pat her hand and I tell her I have some bad news for her. Remember how you like to go to the county fair and eat them deep fried Twinkies, "Yes" she says. I turn the laptop that was sitting on the table towards her so she could read the article of the Hostess company going out of business. I hear her saying quietly that is just not right. I pat her shoulder as I get up and grab my coat, telling her I will be back Sunday night, She gives me a small wave of her hand and continues to read. I close the door behind me knowing that if there is a Ding Dong or a Twinkie at Lake Iwanttobethere to be found, she will find them. From Lake Iwanttobethere {857,924}

[Bobby Bass]

All in all a pretty good two weeks at deer camp. The last day was spent in the woods and that buck on the thermometer was jumping right around fifty-five degrees. Warm enough to go fishing if one had a boat that was not in storage. After a lunch of fried tatters and onions and some chunk's of venison mixed in guys loaded trucks and the headed out for a last sit on the stands. No one saw anything but we were ok with that, sometimes it is good just to be out in the woods and walk back down the trail knowing you are done. No one left the parking area until everyone had made it out of the woods, a few grouse were seen and I kept my ears open listening to the guys describe where they were seen. I might be able to come up the day before Thanksgiving and see if Duncan and Bud can add a few birds to the supper table.

The only thing left in the Hotel fridge was a can of Hamms and a couple of hard boiled eggs and I think Elmer ate the eggs and drank the beer. Even though some of us had spent days together at the Hotel we still lingered in the parking lot chatting. Still coming up with stories to tell or repeating good ones one last time. After awhile it went quiet and trucks that were started were almost to warm to sit in now. Someone got in their truck and the door slammed loudly in the darkness of the still woods. They did not leave but continued to talk with the window rolled down. For the third or maybe the fourth time someone said good-bye and finally a truck was put in gear and started to roll up the logging trail that we refer to as a driveway. Others followed and the headlights swept across the newly stained but now deserted front porch of the Hotel.

I was the last to go as I usually am, Chuck in his truck was at the edge of the clearing as I made one last check on the new outhouse door to make sure it was closed. I rattled the padlock on the Hotel door and made sure the piece of rubber inner tube covered the lock so it will keep the weather off. I walked over to the Tahoe and slipped in behind the wheel, lowered some of the windows to let some heat out and turned on the headlights. I reached for the half gone cigar in the ashtray and into my pocket for a book of seldom used matches. Just like in the old days I had the cigar in my mouth and drove with my left hand as I separated a paper match in the book from the others. I folded the match over to reach the striker strip and flicked it across with my thumb, flame on the first time. I put fire to my cigar and took a few good puffs to make sure it was lit.

With my coat covered left arm hanging out the open window and my orange hat on the dash I followed the taillights of Chuck's truck down the tote road. In and out of a few wet puddles and a few narrow spaces where trees have gotten close. A few minutes later and I was at the shoulder of the blacktop road that would take me home. Chuck's taillight's were already gone over the first hill and I was alone with just woods and stars. Nothing but blackness in my rearview mirror, the woods and the deer camp are quiet again, from Lake Iwanttobethere {860,116}

[Bobby Bass]

Yesterday I felt like I was living in a call center as plans were being made and exchanged for the ladies shopping adventure on Black Friday. No longer will they be getting up and heading out at four to stand in line for the six o'clock early store openings. Matter of fact last year I think the stores were open at midnight and this year they are opening at eight PM the night before. If ya ask me they took someone's bright idea and rode it right into the ground. But it is an excuse for the wife and daughters and some aunts to go shopping together and it is like their deer opener. I never gave it much attention but there appears to be a great amount of detail and planning involved. Since I had to field a few of the calls I am now aware of some of the planning.

I fear men would not be good at the logistics of planning a foray into the shopping world at four in the morning. From what I understand not just one morning paper needs to be purchased but several as there may be valuable coupons inside. An attack route to the stores must be planned with trips for the morning paper and the best cup of coffee and Danish. Parking is addressed and like a precession paratrooper unit a glide route is made where the first wave of shoppers will exit the vehicle as close to the doors as possible. The driver will then park the car and secure the exit route to the next store almost like the wheel man in a bank robbery. The shoppers will enter the store with one of them immediately heading to the checkouts to secure a spot in line while the others shop. After making their selections they will exchange places with the one in line so she can do her shopping.

Communication is the key as phones are always at the ready and sometimes teenage daughters are brought along to use their texting skills. Lists are a thing of the past as the battled harden veterans have on their forearms the same kind of aid that quarterbacks use to call plays. Not only does the one gal in line hold their place but she can audible in sales to the others. Some of the ladies are quite serious about their shopping and soccer shin pads and hockey elbow pads are borrowed from grand kids. Some stores stagger their opening and the crowds move like a swarm of ants across blacktop to arrive in mass just as the manager is turning the key. Foolish to be in their way and I think that is why a smart man decided Black Friday would be for women.

I say that because I like many other men here at Lake Iwanttobethere will still be sleeping late after eating a tad to much turkey and stuffing and then having a bedtime snack of some more turkey. Apple pie will be in there but one can ever have to much apple pie. No school for kids and they will awake way too early for this grand pa. I will just tell them to have some turkey for breakfast, turn on the TV and try not to break anything. I will go back to sleep but not really sleep, doze perhaps. From time to time I will feel a sharp pain in my left hip, right where I usually keep my wallet. When you have been married as long as I have you know when the wife is spending money, from Lake Iwanttobethere. {862,120}